Swiping into modern love: How technology has changed dating

Dating has changed a lot since technology, like online dating and dating apps, has become more popular. We were once reliant on personal introductions and meet-cute chance encounters, but modern romance revolves more around dating apps and social media. Swiping, liking and direct messaging have redefined how we connect with others.

Apps like Bumble or Tinder use algorithms to suggest matches, while social media like X and Instagram create new spaces–like comment sections and direct messages–for digital flirting. But while technology does make dating a little easier, it also can bring challenges like ghosting and catfishing.

The Pre-Digital Dating Eras

Dating as we know it today is a fairly new idea. It didn’t exist in the same way in ancient times. In ancient Rome, women had little control over their personal lives, with marriage seen as a duty rather than something you did for love. Though, over time, courtship became more common, but was often influenced by your social status and wealth.

But by the 18th century, women started to have more of a say in their romances. The modern concept of dating, as we know it today, emerged around 1896, when the term “date” was first coined. As we neared the 20th century, dating evolved from the traditional relationships of the 1950s to the rise of more individual freedoms in the 1960s.

By the 1990s, meeting people relied on in-person encounters—bars, blind dates and coffee shops—before social media and the internet changed everything.

The Rise of Online Dating

According to a study done by Pew Research Center, about 30% of adults in the U.S. have used dating apps or websites.

Online dating took off in 1995 when the website Match.com was launched. By 2010, nearly 70% of same-sex relationships began online, and the internet surpassed traditional meetings. Today, dating apps account for nearly one-sixth of couples' first meetings leading to marriage.

Online dating has now become a major force in modern dating. A Stanford study found that by 2017, 40% of heterosexual couples and 60% of same-sex couples in the U.S. met online.

Today, Tinder leads with 1.6 billion swipes daily, while other apps like Bumble and Hinge cater to different dating styles, from casual hookups to serious relationships.

Pros of Online Dating

Like with anything, there are pros and cons to online dating. For example, online dating gives us easy access to a large pool of potential partners and allows users anywhere from remote areas to big cities to connect with people all around the world.

Many online dating platforms also allow you to add personality traits and interests to your profile to allow you to meet more compatible partners.

Additionally, online communication allows us to interact with potential suitors online before actually meeting in person, which can allow us to feel safer when finally meeting them. This is especially helpful for those who live busy lives to connect with people without going out to events or parties.

Cons of Online Dating

Unfortunately, there are cons to online dating. First, online dating can be super overwhelming. There’s an abundance of choices right at your fingertips, and matching algorithms aren’t always accurate. People can appear different in person than they do online, and catfishing is a real problem to watch out for.

Online communication also lacks the face-to-face component, making it harder to gauge whether or not you have chemistry or a natural connection with the person you are messaging.

Managing Online Dating

While it all seems overwhelming at first, there are plenty of ways to make online dating work. First, limit your choices. You can do this by narrowing down your potential matches to common interests or making your matches’ location circle smaller. Instead of endlessly swiping through profiles, focus on connecting with people who have common interests. Take the time to read people's profiles to learn what they like.

Trusting your instincts is also major. If something feels or looks fishy or someone is making you uncomfortable, you can unmatch or even block the user.

Online communication should serve as a starting point for building a relationship. Remember that, ideally, this will lead to a face-to-face relationship, so don’t be afraid to be open.

The internet has transformed how we connect with each other—in good and bad ways. By trusting your instincts and narrowing your searches, online dating can be a great tool for building meaningful relationships.