How to Live with a Stranger

Moving to Southeast Missouri State University (SEMO) is an exciting time, full of new experiences and friendships. However, living with a new roommate can be a challenge. Whether your roommate is a stranger or your high school best friend, sharing a small space and spending significant time together requires adjustment.

In most cases, if you make an effort to be a good roommate, those actions will be reciprocated. Keep shared spaces clean and be courteous of your roommate while they’re home. In other words, avoid loud phone conversations late at night and don’t let trash pile up.

The easiest way to avoid arguments or fights is to set boundaries early. Within the first few weeks of moving in, have a sit-down conversation with your roommate to establish guidelines for cleaning, sharing items, quiet hours, and anything you feel strongly about. You don’t need a rule for everything, but creating a system of mutual respect will strengthen your relationship. The sooner you agree on basic topics, the less time negative feelings have to form. Even if you and your roommate are not necessarily best friends, you can still live together harmoniously.

Remember, it may take time to settle in with a new person. Some roommates are best friends from the second they move in and live together all four years of college, while some duos live their lives separately. Don’t be discouraged if you and your roommate don’t become close right away. It’s easy to misinterpret a lack of friendship as dislike, but it is very common. In college, the goal isn’t always to be best friends - it’s to coexist peacefully and focus on your own success.