The do’s and don’ts of dating apps

Online dating has made it easier than ever for us to meet and connect with people all around the world. But navigating this new digital dating world can be tricky. It requires the right approach, from creating a profile that shows off your authentic self to recognizing red flags.

Understanding what to do and not to do while using dating apps can help you to stay safe and increase your chances of finding a meaningful connection online.

Do: Establish boundaries early on

Prioritizing your safety and setting boundaries is key to a healthy dating experience. Setting those clear boundaries early on in the (potential) relationship helps to establish mutual respect and understanding of what is expected. When you do decide to take your chats offline, trust your instincts, choose a public place and have an exit plan. Always be cautious of unusual requests, and avoid sharing too much personal information too soon.

Most importantly, consent is a nonnegotiable—no means no.

Do: Watch out for red flags

When first starting out with online dating, it’s important to learn different red flags and things to avoid. One thing to watch for is overt sexual remarks. Having healthy chemistry with someone is important, but early or pushy sexual comments can indicate a lack of respect or boundaries. If someone refuses face-to-face meetings or video chats, it could be a signal that they are hiding something, like their real identity.

Another thing to watch out for is if they are pushing for intimacy fast, whether emotional, physical or financial. If they don’t display regard for your comfort, it can indicate intentions to manipulate you or create unrealistic expectations.

Do: Be authentic

When creating a profile on a dating app, make sure to be authentic and true to yourself. Create a profile that genuinely represents you. Use a variety of photos and write a bio that is engaging, positive and accurate to you. Show your personality off by highlighting your interests and hobbies, which can help attract like-minded people to your profile.

Don’t be afraid to embrace authenticity and vulnerability. The more you stay true to yourself, the more meaningful connections you’ll build.

Do: Be open to going offline

While taking an online relationship offline can be a nerve-wracking experience, it’s important to recognize that at the end of the day, you are on these apps because your end goal is a relationship. Texting and video chats can create a sense of closeness. Nothing replaces face-to-face interaction. Meeting in person can help you get a better sense of your natural chemistry and the authenticity of the person you are talking to. It can also help to establish trust between one another and confirm whether your connection feels as natural offline as it does online.

Don’t: Ghost

One of the major cons of online dating is ghosting. We’ve all been in a situation where we think we have a connection with someone, and all of a sudden, they’re gone. Ghosting someone on a dating app may seem like an easy way to end a conversation you aren’t enjoying, but it can leave the person on the other end of the phone confused and hurt.

A simple, respectful message is the best way to deal with someone you are not interested in. Be direct with your message, but don’t be unkind just because you can. Good communication creates a better dating app experience for everyone involved, and treating others with respect helps us to build a more positive online dating culture. But remember—if someone is blatantly respecting your boundaries or threatening your safety, that is a different story, where “ghosting” or blocking them may be warranted.

Don’t: Be aggressive or pushy

It’s important to show interest in the person you are messaging but avoid coming across as aggressive or overwhelming. If you don’t get a response back right away, don’t send multiple messages asking where they went or why they aren’t responding. This can put pressure on the other person and create discomfort and distrust in the relationship. Be respectful and considerate of the person you’re chatting with. Just because they don’t respond right away doesn’t mean they aren’t interested!

Don’t: Share too much personal information too fast

While one of the biggest “do’s” is being authentic, you should also be wary about oversharing too many personal details online. Avoid sharing information like your full name, address or other sensitive information before you fully know you can trust someone. You never know what could happen, and you could be unwittingly giving your information to a scammer or identity thief. Protecting your privacy helps to ensure a safer experience for both you and the person you’re messaging.

Don’t: Lie on your profile to impress

Although it may be tempting to sneak a harmless white lie onto your dating profile to appear more impressive, being honest right off the bat is crucial for building healthy relationships. While it may seem harmless to exaggerate your experiences, true and meaningful connections are built on honesty and authenticity. Being honest about who you are allows your matches to fall for the real you.

Using dating apps to meet new people can be rewarding when you approach it with honesty, respect and care. Set boundaries and stay true to yourself to build solid connections. By following these do’s and don’ts, you can have a safe and positive time on dating apps.